Last week, I went grocery shopping with my mom the day before her birthday. I needed a few additional ingredients as I was planning on cooking lunch for my family on her birthday. It is monsoon season here, so when we left the store, it was raining cats and dogs. Both of us had forgotten to carry an umbrella, and we were having a difficult time finding transportation back home. Soaking wet, we finally found a rickshaw that was willing to take us back. A minute into the ride, I received a phone call from my father who was at home with my pup, Coco. The minute I saw his name on my screen, I knew there was some bad news. In this week’s blog, I share what followed that phone call. This is to remind you that we all panic sometimes, and when we do, if we can just slow down for a few minutes, solutions and perspectives can emerge.
My father rang me to tell me to hurry home, because Coco had thrown up multiple times and wasn’t doing well. If you’re new to my blog, then let me introduce you to Coco. He’s my senior dog and my heartbeat, so when he falls ill, I get nervous that it’s time for good-bye. Highly catastrophic thinking, I know, and it’s something I’m working on.
Luckily, my mom and I were only minutes from home when I received my dad’s call. Somehow, I had the wherewithal to call Coco’s vet and let him know that I was urgently bringing him in, but it would take me some time due to the peak traffic hour and torrential rain. He was understanding and told me he’d stick around even after closing hours.
My mom and I quickly got out of the rickshaw with our bags. We were dropped by the main gate, which is a short walk from my parents’ apartment building. I immediately called my husband, because I was in full-blown panic mode. My face wouldn’t betray the state of my mind, but I was freaking out on the inside. I was concerned that Coco was sicker than I assumed. I worried that I wouldn’t get to the vet on time, and I just didn’t understand why this was happening to my baby.
Majority of the time, my husband is as cool as a cucumber, especially under extreme duress. I don’t know how he does it, but it’s a trait for which I am extremely grateful. I was stressed when I told him about Coco’s condition and how I’d have to hurry to get to the vet in time. Like his usual self, he responded calmly, which had the opposite effect on me. Our baby was sick, and he wasn’t showing a trace of worry. So, I raised my voice and got snippy, confirming that he had heard me right. When he answered in the affirmative, I continued to be annoyed by the lack of reaction that I wanted and told him I’d call him later. He checked in again to ask if I wanted him to come to my parents’ place, pick us up and take us to the vet. As much as I was tempted to say yes, I refused, because that would take longer. My behavior was surprising to me, since I’m not normally this reactive. Like I said, it’s something I have to work on when it comes to Coco.
As I made my way to the apartment, I became aware that I needed to regain perspective. This wasn’t me, and I didn’t need to feel so out of control. I’m learning to be kinder to myself, so this was a perfect opportunity to practice it. I told myself that it was understandable for me to panic. These episodes are hard for me with Coco, because my first thought when he gets sick now is that I’ll lose him. I was afraid, that’s all. Once I took a minute to comfort myself, I had more clarity and wasn’t as flustered. I countered my fear with my reality, which I share below.
Coco and I have been through more serious situations pertaining to his health, and this was nowhere close to those times. Unlike before, I had more support with family and friends here. In fact, my father came along to the vet’s clinic and having him in the car with me was soothing. I knew the vet would wait for us, because that’s the relationship that’s been formed over the last couple of years.
I had good visibility in the pouring rain, because my in-laws had been thoughtful enough to have the wipers of my car replaced right before monsoon season. I practiced my lessons in prayer and positivity enroute to the vet by praying and assuring myself that everything was going to be okay. By any chance, if it wasn’t, then the universe would ensure that I had the strength to get through a tougher diagnosis.
My other realization was that the rainy season usually doesn’t bode well for Coco, so his gastrointestinal issues shouldn’t come as a surprise. I also figured out the cause of his sickness, which will help me be more careful in the future.
I mentally performed my go-to exercise when anxiety kicks in, which is identifying what is in my control, what is not, and focusing on the former rather than the latter. My very last thought was that there wasn’t vomit and piss waiting for me to clean up when I returned. My mom was kind enough to take care of that mess before we got back.
The vet prescribed meds for Coco’s upset stomach. If his symptoms did not subside after a couple of days, then we’d consider bloodwork and x-rays. I went home slightly relieved, knowing there was a way to make Coco feel better. Once home, he was fed, given his medicine and put to bed. He slept like a log that night.
When the perceived loss of anyone or anything is great, so is the fear. Nevertheless, it is up to us to learn to be our own anchors in those moments. Through coping tools and awareness, we can rebound from high stress situations and even tame our reactions to them. In my case, those tools have become awareness through meditation, gratitude, self-compassion, and acceptance. I need to continue to sharpen these tools, because I will always be a work in progress.
You probably already know your triggers, so pause and ask yourself which tools you fall back on when those triggers occur. Ask yourself whether they are helpful, and if they are, then how can you strengthen them to return to a less stressful state more quickly. And, if you don’t have any ways of coping with the emotional hijack, then address that, because you deserve better 😊
As always, I am here to support you all the way. I hope you keep in touch with your stories, thoughts, and feedback. If you wish to learn more, please stop by www.imperfectbodies.com. Lastly, if you enjoyed this information, then please share it with others.
My free 7-day mini course on Eating Mindfully for Weight Balance and Stress Management available here: https://fierce-originator-1156.kit.com/1577ad5668
All the best,
Chaitni